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Tingling Tensions @ Thursday, March 08, 2012 The air is stuffy even though it wasn't hot, it's almost disappearing, the air, there's not enough air in here! Tingles in my hands and face, dizzy, my heart is racing, she's laughing at me! everyone's watching... I think I yelled at her. Or maybe I just screamed. The button on the door turns green and beeps, and I grab my bag and bolt out the door, not knowing where I am, or caring, I just needed to get out of there. Almost as soon as I'm out the door, on the platform, I collapse against the fence hysterically crying, unable to stand, while the other commuters ignore me or edge away.  It all happened so fast, I don't really remember what happened exactly. I suppose I'm lucky to be alive, the last time I had a panic attack I passed out, though that time it was on stage (in the wings) and not anywhere near a train. It's not very clear what happened. I was cleaning my glasses (didn't have time for contacts this morning), and I put them on the seat opposite me. Blank. The next moment a sz16/18 dark haired woman in a black pant suit with big black (round?) sunglasses, was sitting on the glasses, though I didn't notice, and nor did she (O.o, you'd think if you sat on something that wasn't flat you'd realize right?) till I looked everyone and couldn't find them - and then realize she was on them. I got them back somehow. Called someone for the closest optometrist, as the frame was bent. I told the person on the phone that a woman had sat on the glasses, and the woman yells at me, for putting my glasses on the seat in the beginning (it wasn't a peak hour train!). I resist the temptation to slap her, or comment on her size (no offence to anyone of that size, it was just that one woman, driving me crazy) I was close to losing it. I got off the phone. Put on some hand cream, in a psychotic manner, I tried to stop, but couldn't, and it just got worse.  Somehow I managed to stop crying, and breathe. And I notice that one of the lenses on my glasses is missing, a lady nearby helps me look for it on the platform, but it's not there. The train arrives, I'm ok I think, but not enough to carry on and go to class. Not now that my glasses are broken and I feel like I'm crazy. I think the lens is either still on the train, or on the railway. At the main station the station master helps me find the train, while a paramedic asks me questions and checks my breathing. They found the train and stopped it, the carriage was searched, but they couldn't find the lens. Without my glasses/contacts I can't see, instead of going to class I made the 1.5hr trip back to get my contacts. I felt a lot better not being surrounded by people and lots of noises. Crashed, and had a nap. And that was half of Thursdays, leaving at 7.15am, and arriving at college at 2.30pm. With a total of almost 6hrs spent on traveling/at the station wait for the bus. The 2nd half of Thursday will be in the week recap post - sorry about the order.
If we were in it for the money, we'd all be accountants... @ Monday, March 05, 2012 Today we spent 3hrs traveling for a one hour class in which we discussed two questions, one of which still confuses me. Originally I also had a lecture on today, but I changed classes (the guy had an accent). I'd change the other class, for a better time/day, but then I might get a tutor I don't understand. The first question today we discussed was about the incentive the government is suggesting, where high performance teachers be rewarded. Two were for it (including the guy on my right) and the rest were right-fully against it. If teachers were offered this reward then there would be more people who'd choose the career for the wrong reason, thinking that they could be the best in that subject, I can certainly name a few people like this. But the thing is, people who choose to become teachers do so because it's what they want, to be a mentor to kids (in some cases) and be a good influence on them, and to hopefully be remembered as an awesome/fabulous teacher. If you're in it for the money you're weird, seriously another degree that takes the same time could get you earning much more. Though if we were in it for the money, we'd all be accountants. Along the way we defined what a high performance teacher was and how it would be measured - the complete topic's link to economics is unknown -, and promotions. Last yr mr health got promoted, and we all know why he got it, exp (lots of it, I swear he's older than he looks, he's not even old, he's more young-ish), he's very dedicated (even though he has a life and family) and spends a lot of time helping kids; and it does help to be that person everyone like. -There is a relevant point here - It was not about hours spent on admin. and research. To be promoted at this college, it's all about admin & research hours. Time spent helping kids out of class is called "consultation hours" and are often very limited. What if you have a lecture/another class on at that time? Email it I suppose... Tutors here are in fact aren't rewarded or gain any sort of points towards a promotion, and this in a way is discouraging them from helping the kids out of these hours. And with an emphasis on "self-learning" no wonder not many are understanding anything and as a result failing. And what makes it even worse for this subject, if that it used to run for a year, but now partially due to lack of funding it has been crammed into half the time, but still with the same amount of work. 
One Stormy Carnival @ Saturday, March 03, 2012 Sorry for the lack of posts, figured that when I have free time I should start creating posts that don't need to be time lined for auto-post while I'm away working/traveling, which has been a lot this past week. Things to look forwards to:
At lunch they had a carnival thing on, with free popcorn, churros, cotton candy. Unfortunately they didn't have the clown that made balloon animals around. We had the class for eco after lunch, the tutor, was fascinating and very open - she's Australian, had 5 piercings in one ear, short hair and recommended the best coffee shop in town.  Yes that is popcorn on the side. Thursday, early start. An hour late, when it's stormy the trains run late up to 20mins, but the buses don't run late - and they come every 30mins. PD, what's is the point of this class? The first class was like networking. We got partnered up randomly and I was with a boy from China, and got bit and pieces of what he was saying. I don't understand accents. First I first arrived, the teacher introduces me "This is Charlotte, from Canada" and I'm like O.o. It was like that moment in Mean Girls, except that being Caucasian I could have come from any English speaking, caucasian as a majority country. I'm not from Canada nor have ever been there. I'm American.  After lunch on level 3, which turned out to be ground level, when you see it from the street (this college is in an interesting location, in the side of a hill), we had Marketing. I'm starting to notice something. Sasha, that girl in my first class is in all my lectures O.O and makes it a point to challenge me each time. It's actively competitive around here with some people. Marketing is my favorite subject this week, and I spent 4hrs doing notes. Another accented lecturer, but he's slightly better than the other one. The problem is that when I get what he's just said he's moved on, due to my brain lag in translation.  Everyone loves Fridays, but I love them for another reason. Computers. I don't bring my laptop to classes, it weighs too much and costs way too much. The library has many computers, and they take booking a week in advance. On Fridays after lunch no one's in the library, and you can book 'em for up to 6hrs. Slept in and missed events, and they let everyone out an hour early. Though the class was still on, though now it might be cancelled. As there's 4 of us, and apparently it's not worth running a class for four. Being the last class of the day we were the last to pick time slots for an activity, and as a result I'm probably going to fail. There's morning and night, and I can't do night w/o an escort, for safety reasons. 3/4 of the class wants to be a wedding planner (the one being a boy) the competition is so intense you can feel it. Fortunately I'm not in the 2nd class where 22 girls want to be wedding planners. There's so much competition, it's like a clash between the amazing race and survivor with the bitchy-ness of Four Weddings. We had coffee on campus today, finally summoned the courage to do it XD. The place I always go to for coffee is sadly on the other side of town now and 2hrs away. Vittoria Coffee, it was decent, nothing special - till the end where you get all the sugar. Service was na like most cheap asian eatteries - the deal is you don't speak their language, they don't speak yours, or if they do speak English it's very little. Though the coffee here is better than the Spanish Doughnut ones at the station.  |
Hi. I'm Charlie. Capricorn. ISFJ. Engaged. From CA, studying events in Melbourne. This is a blog about food, photography, hot chocolate & cupcakes, events, shopping, and the occasional beauty product review. Want to contact me? Click here to email me.  Follow Me? 
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